Friday, July 23, 2010

My Bonnie

My Bonnie lies over the ocean
My Bonnie lies over the sea
My Bonnie lies over the ocean
Oh bring back my Bonnie to me

Bring back, bring back
Bring back my Bonnie to me, to me
Bring back, bring back
Bring back my Bonnie to me

Last night as I lay on my pillow
Last night as I lay on my bed
Last night as I lay on my pillow
I dreamed that my Bonnie was dead


Oh blow the winds o'er the ocean
And blow the winds o'er the sea
Oh blow the winds o'er the ocean
And bring back my Bonnie to me


The winds have blown over the ocean
The winds have blown over the sea
The winds have blown over the ocean
And brought back my Bonnie to me


Thursday, July 1, 2010

Naval Vessel Hijacked Crossing the Line

Aboard the Battleship Louisiana in 1907 the following incident occurred and was recorded in,


The Commander-in-Chief U. S. Atlantic Fleet received the following signal:
"By virtue of the authority invested in me by his Majesty, Neptunus Rex, ruler of the Royal Domain, I have to inform you that I have this night boarded the good ship Louisiana for the purpose of informing the commanding officer that he has entered the domain ruled by his Majesty and that he has a cargo of landlubbers, polly-wogs and sea lawyers on board whom it will be necessary to initiate into the royal realm before he can pass through, and as such his Most Gracious Majesty will tomorrow morning board the good ship Louisiana and carry out the ceremonies as prescribed by the regulations of the royal realm. His Majesty wishes me to convey his compliments to you and to state that he is pleased to have you with him once more in his royal domain, although it has been some time since he has been able to greet you personally."

MAIN TOP BOWLINE, Secretary of His Most Gracious Majesty,


Ruler of the Royal Domain.

Admiral Evans signalled back his thanks for the greeting, sent his compliments to Neptune and expressed the hope that Neptune and his party would have a "royal good time on the Louisiana."

The next morning ...his Majesty and consort and their court of fifty-two persons in stately step trod the deck to greet Capt. Wainwright. Neptune swung his trident proudly, and as he came to a full stop he said:
" Sir : I have come to-day to your ship to exercise the full command that pertains to the rule of my domain. I have come to initiate the landlubbers and pollywogs on this vessel. You will relinquish command to me and I expect that full honors will be paid to my rank. I am honoring this ship of the fleet especially because my distinguished friend and colleague, the President of the country from which you come, once used this ship on a near approach to my dominions. I am informed that he would be here today in person if the cares of State did not prevent. I am told he is here in spirit. I shall order, therefore, a special honorary certificate of membership for him. [Aside, "Can't some of you keep that damned monkey from screeching so much?"] I shall now proceed to your cabin, after which the ceremonies of the royal initiations will proceed."

... Neptune himself wore a scarlet robe with sea serpents em- broidered on it and with a golden hemp fringe all around the edges. His face and legs and arms were stained a beautiful mahogany color. A great beard of yellow rope hung down over his fat belly. Amphitrite was in white. She wore a sea green flat hat and carried a black cat done up in baby's clothes. That cat stayed with her for two hours without moving. "My!" said one of the ordinary seamen who had cruised many a time along the Bowery, "don't she look just as if she came straight from the Bowery and Hester street? How are ye, Amph?" A clout on the head by a mate made him "shorten his chin sail."

The lawyers opened their books to certain paragraphs of the "Revised Statutes," chiefly paragraph 4-11-44; the barbers sharpened their enormous razors, "made in Yarmany" ; the policemen drew up in line, the orderlies rolled up the barrel of lather, made of oatmeal and water, and another barrel of "tonic," to be used in enormous squirt guns. It was Neptune's "dope" for the unruly. Then Neptune, with a flourish of his trident and settling his gilt crown well back on his head, as Amphitrite nestled to his side, asked if all prep- arations had been completed. "Yes, your Majesty," replied Main Top Bowline. "Then let the initiations proceed. Bring forward as the first victim that newspaper man. He shall have special attention," was the command. The Sun man mounted the steps to the howls of 800 persons. Dr. Flip sounded his lungs, examined his teeth, felt his arms and legs, made him wiggle his fingers and then said: "Your Majesty, a very bad case. 'E's got a ingrowin' brain!" "What do you prescribe?" "Well, your Majesty, we have here medicines for the cure of spavin, sore throat, consumption, chilblains, diphtheria, eczema, measles, neuralgia, heartburn "Never mind the rest," said the King. "What is the treatment?" "The same for all, sire," was the response. "A good shave, an injection in the arm of my 'dope' [composed of molasses and water] some powder on his head and a ducking in the briny seas." "Very good!" replied his Majesty. Then the trouble began.

... While the initiations were going on Neptune ordered this message semaphored to Admiral Evans, the Commander in Chief: Admiral R. D. Evans, U.S. Atlantic Fleet.
I am happy to inform you that your son and the son of the captain of your noble flagship have this day declared their allegiance as my loyal subjects.
Lieuts. F. T. Evans and H. W. Osterhaus are attached to the Louisiana and occasionally they have to take a good deal of chaffing and no favors when an "unofficial message" from "father " comes over the signals. This was the reply that Neptune received from the flagship:
Neptune Rex: We are delighted that our sons are at last real sailors. They have Served a long time. Soak 'em, boys !
... Occasionally a sea lawyer, one with an established reputation as such among the crew, would come up. He was asked if he wanted to argue his case. Not one of them did. "Give it to him good," Neptune would shout. And they did. The rest of the crew understood the significance of the extra ducking and howls of glee resulted. The sea lawyers usually had to be helped out of the tank.

...So hour after hour the initiation went on until the last man had been rounded up and Neptune pronounced the day's work well done. He sent this signal to Admiral Evans : The Commander-in-Chief, U. S. Atlantic Fleet.
I have to inform the Commander-in-Chief that I have completed the ceremonies on board the good ship Louisiana, will haul down my standard and take my departure. The Commander-in-Chief will accept my best wishes for himself, officers and men of the United States Atlantic fleet for a most pleasant voyage, and may all the royal subjects meet again.

NEPTUNUS REX, Ruler of the Royal Domain.

Neptune then retreated into the fo'c'sle for refreshment and remained there until darkness came. Then a barrel filled with oakum and oil and tar was set on fire and put afloat. It sailed away in the night. It was "Neptune's boat," and he was going back to his royal domains. After he had gone certificates duly signed and embellished with mermaids and sea urchins and starfish and ropes, with an octopus for a background and a picture of Neptune rising from the sea at the top and with the ship's seal affixed to bits of red, white and blue ribbon, were presented to all hands. Never again will a man who can show one of them have to take a dousing and barbering with suitable medical treatment on crossing the line.

Saturday, May 15, 2010

Rumored as Being Heard as the S.S. T.E.C. Goes Down

Today, Mary Glasspool, a non celibate homosexual, is being ordained as a suffragan bishop in the Episcopal church in Los Angeles. I submitted this hymn as a suggestion for their liturgy,

Nearer, my God, to Thee, nearer to Thee!
E’en though it be a cross that raiseth me,
Still all my song shall be, nearer, my God, to Thee.


Nearer, my God, to Thee,
Nearer to Thee!

Though like the wanderer, the sun gone down,
Darkness be over me, my rest a stone.
Yet in my dreams I’d be nearer, my God to Thee.


There let the way appear, steps unto Heav’n;
All that Thou sendest me, in mercy given;
Angels to beckon me nearer, my God, to Thee.


Then, with my waking thoughts bright with Thy praise,
Out of my stony griefs Bethel I’ll raise;
So by my woes to be nearer, my God, to Thee.


Or, if on joyful wing cleaving the sky,
Sun, moon, and stars forgot, upward I’ll fly,
Still all my song shall be, nearer, my God, to Thee.


There in my Father’s home, safe and at rest,
There in my Savior’s love, perfectly blest;
Age after age to be, nearer my God to Thee.


Words: Sarah Adams, 1841

Adams, Sarah, nee Flower. b. at Harlow, Essex, Feb. 22nd, 1805; d. in London, Aug. 14, 1848, and was buried at Harlow, Aug. 21,1848. She was the younger daughter of Mr. Benjamin Flower, editor and proprietor, of The Cambridge Intelligencer; and was married, in 1834, to William B. Adams, a civil engineer. In 1841 she pub. Vivia Perpetua, a dramatic poem dealing with the conflict of heathenism and Christianity, in which Vivia Perpetua suffered martyrdom; and in 1845, The Flock at the Fountain; a catechism and hymns for children. As a member of the congregation of the Rev. W. J. Fox, an Unitarian minister in London, she contributed 13 hymns to the Hys. and Anthems, pub. by C. Fox, Lond., in 1841, for use in his chapel. Of these hymns the most widely known are— u Nearer,my God,to Thee," and "He sendeth sun, He sendeth shower." The remaining eleven, most of which have come into common use, more especially in America, are :—

1. Creator Spirit! Thou the first. Holy Spirit.
2. Darkness shrouded Calvary. Good Friday.
3. Gently fall the dews of eve. Evening.
4. Go, and watch the Autumn leaves. Autumn.
5. O hallowed memories of the past. Memories.
6. O human heart! tbou hast a song. Praise.
7. O I would sing a song of praise. Praise.
8. O Love ! thou makest all things even. Love.
9. Part in Peace ! is day before us ? Close of Service.
10. Sing to the Lord ! for His mercies are sure. Praise.
11. The mourners came at break of day. Easter.

Mrs. Adams also contributed to Novello's musical edition of Songs for the Months, n. d. Nearly all of the above hymns are found in the Unitarian collections of G. Brit, and America. In Martineau's Hymns of P. and P., 1873, No. 389, there is a rendering by her from Fenelon: —" Living or dying, Lord, I would be Thine." It appeared in the Hys. and Anthems, 1841.
-John Julian, Dictionary of Hymnology (1907)