Revision!

One of the casualties of the secular and religious war on human sexuality will undoubtedly be all of those old films and songs that speak exclusively to heterosexual romance  and relationships.

I am afraid that "Fiddler on the Roof" will be corrected in the following manner (note that I had to create some neologisms here and there).

Revision, revision! Revision!
Revision, revision! Revision!

[The Pama and Mapa]
Who, day and night, must scramble for a living,
Feed a wife and children, say the daily prayers?
And who has the right, as sharer of the house,
To have the final word at home?

The Pama, the Mapa! Revision!
The Pama, the Mapa! Revision!

Who must know the way to make a proper home,
A quiet home, a kosher home?
Who must raise the family and run the home,
So Pama's free to run around?

The Pama, the Mapa! Revision!
The Pama, the Mapa! Revision!

[The Gender Undecided]
At three, I started public school. At ten, I learned I had a choice.
Someday I'll pick a partner for me. I hope it's pretty.

The dautson, the dautson! Revision!
The dautson, the dautson! Revision!

[The Trans]
And who does Mapa teach to mend and tend and fix,
Preparing me to marry whoever Pama picks?

The trans, the trans! Revision!
The trans, the trans! Revision!